Connection

As I mentioned in today's Module Morsel, my focus for this holiday season with my family is to feel the spiritual connection between us. I find it can be so tricky with family to maintain my consciousness. It can be very easy to fall back into old ways of being with those from whom I learned them. This holiday I am focusing on the connection, feeling the connection. It has been deeply profound so far...

Honoring yourself

"At its core, loving yourself simply means believing in your own essential worthiness.  It is nurturing a healthy sense of positive self-regard and knowing in your heart that you are a valuable link in the universal chain.  Loving yourself also means actively caring for every facet of yourself.  It shows up in every action you take, from putting on a sweater to protect yourself from a chill to leaving a job that does not fulfill you.  It means tuning in to your own wants and needs and honoring them..." - Cherie Carter-Scott Ph.D.

Do you love yourself?  I mean really love yourself?  You might say, "Of course I do!" but I encourage you to really explore this.  For today, pay attention to how you treat yourself and ask yourself some rich questions.

• Do I take care of my basic needs or do I ignore them for the sake of saving time, or giving to others instead?
• Do I say things to myself that I wouldn't say to others?
• Do I act out of love and desire or out of guilt or shame?
• Do I needless suffer when I could do something to change my situation?
• Do I get enough sleep, water, exercise, healthy food?

Then tomorrow take 1 whole day to treat yourself well.  In the eating module we asked, "What if Jesus came to dinner - what would you serve?"  Well, pretend that you are as important as Jesus (or Buddha, or Mohammed) and treat yourself that way.  Serve good food, drink fresh clean water, talk nicely to yourself.  Be good to yourself.

Giving Love

"Love is above all, the gift of oneself."  - Jean Anouilh

In the book, Love is Letting Go of Fear by Gerald G. Jampolsky, M.D., he tells of a patient of his that came to him with severe depression.  This person was so in despair he believed he had nothing to live for.  Dr. Jampolsky asked him if he knew of anyone that needed help such as meals cooked, deliveries, a visit.  The man mentioned that there was an elderly woman in his building who lived along and didn't get out much.  He knew she didn't have much money and noticed she didn't ever have visitors.  Dr. Jampolsky's prescription to this man was to go to this woman and give to her.  To bring her meals, to go to the grocery for her, to bring her books from the library and to spend time visiting with her.  

The man came back the next week transformed.  No longer feeling in such deep despair he regaled Dr. Jampolsky with his wonderful experience.  The man realized that in helping another he forgot all about his own despair.  Not only that, but he made a connection with another human being and changed 2 lives in the process.

During this time - both the time of the holidays and a time that may be challenging to some financially - more than ever we need to find ways to give.  Give whatever it is you have to give, such as money, donations, time or attention.  And Give from your heart.  Know that giving Love is the most important contribution you can make to this world.

Feeling Love

Of course it's fitting that we study Love in December, that time of the year when almost every people around the world celebrate some sort of major holiday and usually one that promotes reflection, gratitude, joy and love.
In what often turns into a busy rush (often centered on material things), allow yourself to slow down and appreciate everything around you. Find things of beauty in your world, spend time in or admiring nature, go to gatherings not out of obligation but in effort to connect with fellow human beings, send cards with personal messages, tell your loved ones that you do, in fact, love them. Don't forget yourself! Do something special for yourself today, for love begins with loving yourself.
I was in a store today and a complete stranger came up to me holding a Santa Claus figurine and asked if I thought he (santa) looked happy. Puzzled, my response was "yes". The man laughed and said, "really?". As I looked at the figure I determined that the man was on to something. The man even said that it looked like Santa had bags under his eyes. I laughed. The man said that he did it all in an effort just to hear me laugh. I laughed again and said "thank you, we all need that". I told him to keep up the good work and to have a wonderful day. And I meant it.
Who can you make laugh today? Can you find something to laugh at? Take time to connect.

Spiritual Commitment

At the beginning of November I had made a commitment to focus on giving and gratitude for the month. I do a number of different things in my spiritual practice and these two areas are already such a part of what I feel. My commitment then was to expand them. I had joined an online community call 29 Days of Giving with the idea of giving every day and documenting it. I know I give each day, it's just that I didn't often think about it. It was also an opportunity to up the ante, so to speak. I was pushing myself out of my comfort zone a little and giving more than I usually do, especially when it came to money.
I also committed to not only thinking about what I was grateful for, but writing down each day the things that I was grateful for. Big things like my kids and my husband and my house and little things like my new boots or the card I received in the mail from my friend.
I bought a new journal and started writing every day both my gives and my gratitudes. It was going well for awhile...and then "life" got in the way. I say that jokingly because it's all life. I'm not going to be hard on myself for not being consistent. I'm also not giving up. I write as much as I can and still try to at least think of my gives and gratitudes every day. It is a reminder of how blessed I am and how truly wonderful this world is.

Renewing My Practice

I resonate with today's Module Morsel. Regularly reviewing the efficacy of my practice is essential in my life. Because I know my Spiritual Practice helps me feel grounded and centered, when I am not feeling grounded and centered, I know I need to make a change in my practice. Sometimes I need to shift something because of a change of beliefs. Sometimes I need to rearrange commitments to have more time for my practice. Other times I need to do less because it is feeling too cluttered. Knowing I can change my practice makes it more conscious.

A Discussion on Spiritual Practice

Here is a 13 minute podcast in which Laura, Marya, and Tammy discuss this month's focus. You can hear about Marya's very inspiring focus for the month, how Tammy is affected by her practice, and Laura's work to expand her Spiritual Practice without expanding her time on her Spiritual Practice. Enjoy!

Spiritual Practice: All the Time!

So, I decided my focus for this month was to deepen my daily spiritual practice, specifically my nontraditional practices. I am a mother with small children and I am in the process of beginning a new company. My time is gloriously full so, right now, I choose not to have a long, formal spiritual practice. I prefer to see each moment as an opportunity to be present, practice compassion, and live from the light inside of me. I cook with the intention of nourishing my family, I hug my children with love pouring out of me, I look at my husband attentively when he is speaking to me, I listen with my heart when students need my help.

I also found this post from the other blog. I blog here at the end of most months to summarize what the month meant to me. I had to chuckle because it fit what I am saying here!

Your Spritual Practice

What do you do to get grounded and centered in your heart?

My Hidden Lesson

(Laura) So, I had an interesting chat with Marya today. We were discussing this month’s topic and what we had learned for ourselves. I was mentioning how this month hadn’t been very illuminating for me. I had set a focus for being more aware in my relationship with my extended family. I didn’t think anything had come up for me. Then it hit me, I had had a huge lesson in the area and had almost missed it! I am continually amazed at how, when you set an intention, the lessons come up. I hadn’t even “worked” on it this month!

Say What You Want

"Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change."

I think the same can be said for the things you say. Change the way you say things and the things you say (and look at!) change. One of the things I realized in communicating and meeting my own needs is that I sometimes try to accommodate someone else and don't really say what I want. Such as, "Oh, it doesn't matter where we eat, whatever YOU want is fine with me." Ever said something like that? Try getting a little more specific. It doesn't mean you dictate everything but you certainly can express your preferences. "I'd like to eat Mexican or Italian food, could you choose the restaurant?"

Blaming Myself

So, last week’s Module Morsel was a particular challenge for me. Knowing the difference between blaming myself for a negative interaction (“What did I do/say to make them angry/irritated/impatient?) and being conscious of other people’s feelings while still giving them the space to have their own reaction to me even if it is negative. (I do everything with an open, loving heart and they still have a negative reaction because of their own “stuff”). I had a great conversation with Marya and fellow Awaken to Joy club member, Karen. You can hear it here.

What is a Module Morsel?

When you register for the Awaken to Joy program, you receive a Module Package each month. The Module Package includes a reading (a few pages on the topic by Laura along with some ideas for deepening your study around the topic); a podcast of Laura reading the Module; and you receive the Module Morsel. The Module Morsel is a weekly email in which we share a “snipet” of the monthly reading as well as an idea for the week for your study. That way, the module comes to you in bits and pieces each week!

Communicating as Parents

Here is a conversation Marya and I had during the Words Module month. I thought it would be particularly useful this month so here it is. In this recording, we discuss communicating as parents, the importance of our words and the energy behind them. Enjoy!

Communicating and Our Needs

On last month's teleclass, one of the things we discussed was ways to recognize the needs behind communication. We said that when there is negative communication or negative feelings around a conversation, we can first look to 2 major areas to try and make improvements. The first is unmet basic needs and the other is long held beliefs or issues that we have that creates a negative filter.
Unmet basic needs would be not enough sleep, hungry, etc. The other major area I think an example might be helpful. Maybe I believe that people who have lots of money are "jerks". Let's say I was at a class and speaking to someone I believed had lots of money. I might automatically assume he or she is not going to be nice to me. I might go into the conversation on the defense and angry without a word even being said.
Both of these episodes have occurred in my life recently (and oddly enough in the same building on different days). The later episode did happen to my husband. A conversation did not go well because of his beliefs and assumptions about the other person, who he did not even know. We did discuss later how his assumption may have created unnecessary negative feelings for both he and the other person.
The former episode happened to me just yesterday. I was tired from having taken care of my sick daughter for several days. A stranger made a request of me and I got very irritated. It was quite an innocuous comment but because I was tired I really reacted strongly to it, in a negative way. I did recognize that I wasn't behaving as I normally would, had I felt rested, and at least at the awareness enough to remove myself until I could calm down.
The lesson in both cases is that when you find yourself in those icky feelings in a conversation, you do have the power to stop it and ask yourself, "Do I have needs that can be met in order to help myself feel better?" or "What belief do I have that may be creating a negative filter?". Either one can cause us to not fully hear the other person.

Inspirational Quote

"Who speaks, sows; who listens, reaps."

- Traditional French Saying

My Communication

I have still been thinking about the negative assumptions piece I have written about here and here. I realize that for me it comes to being more conscious of learning than on teaching. (Tricky for a teacher!) When I am in a learning mode, I pause, I listen more, I have space between my thoughts and my words. Letting myself be open to new ideas, being empty for more as a beginner, rather than full like an expert, gives me the space to observe without evaluating. As a beginner, I don't know what everything means and I can let go of preconceived ideas.

Positive Communication

Okay, I admit it, I am still in last week’s assignment and observing without evaluating. This topic has been dramatic for me! As I mentioned in an earlier post, I read somewhere that we create negative evaluations (read: "jumped to conclusions" and "making assumptions") in areas where we lack self-esteem. I have found it so true for me and over the weekend I identified an area in which I created negative evaluations. (And, I mean "created". It was ALL in my head.) I also realized that it was an area in my life in which I have sabotage myself in the past. (No good comes of negative evaluations.) With that new information, I have been able to both shift out of my low self-esteem in those areas, stop sabotaging myself AND move into better communication. So powerful!

Thought on Self-Esteem

I was recently reading that a sign of low self-esteem is interpreting things that are said as having negative meaning. In other words, confusing evaluation with observation of facts (our work for the month) is a sign of low self-esteem! So I have started paying attention to when I tend to interpret what someone says as negative. As I work on separating my observations from my evaluations, I am also working on my self-esteem.

So, tell me, where do you notice your negative assessments coming up? What do you learn from it?

Inspirational Quote

“People are disturbed not by things, but by the view they take of them.”

- Epictetus

Communication: Choosing a Focus for the Month

Over the next two months our focus is communication. Our focus is specifically, being able to communicate in a more compassionate way; a way that connects us to others rather than alienating them. In this month, our smaller focus is learning to observe without evaluation. It is our evaluation that causes us suffering so learning this skill will help eliminate much or our challenges in our life. Of course it doesn’t mean never evaluating a situation, it just means being able to separate what is what is really happening (observing is objective) versus what you think about what is happening (evaluating is subjective).

Frankly, I find this month the most challenging for me to grasp of the entire year. Not only do I have a hard time separating my opinions with my evaluations (they are practically simultaneous), I find it tricky to remember to check myself in the moment. So, for this month, I am going to find a very small area in which to hold my conscious awareness around this idea. I have decided to use driving as my conscious time. Whenever I drive I will be conscious about observing without evaluating.

Your View, My View

It's important to remember that in every situation there really isn't a truth or reality, it is only your perception or view or evaluation of what is happening. Even so-called objective bystanders are only speaking from their viewpoint.
In any given situation one person may feel angry, indignant, laughed at or criticized. While the other person may be feeling the exact opposite! So which one is right? Is there a right?
Try watching a conversation between two people and see if you can observe without taking sides or forming your own opinion. Notice how each person has their own viewpoint and it becomes their own reality. Then can you do it in a conversation you are participating in?

Words: Getting Help

As Marya said in our Personal Comments in this week's Module Morsel, we have been helping each other by noticing when we say something we need to rephrase. My husband and I have been doing it with the way we speak to our children, too. Just remember to only do it with a willing partner! I find not everyone appreciates those corrections...:-)

Inspirational Quote

“You may choose your word like a connoisseur,
And polish it up with art,
But the word that sways, and stirs, and stays,
Is the word that comes from the heart.”

-Ella Wheeler Wilcox, 1906

Lessons Learned Around Words

Okay, so everyone share. What has shifted for you around words either this month or at any other time in your life? What has made the most difference for you? Inspire us!

Expression

Hi Everyone! I missed our call last night but my pondering of words has been a wonderful August focus. It is amazing as we explore these topics how things manage to really fit each month. I have had several family situations where an exploration of words has been useful. Being able to express feelings in away that is communicating well and not venting. I can spot two frustrating situations that although I will not go into details, it was important to pick the best words to own my feelings and express myself without attachment. The first situation was the learning curve and the second went well. Using "I" statements and not the famous "s" word, "should" or pointing fingers at others when really what I need to do is express my own feelings in a healthy way. This has been necessary in raising my 15 year old. Being a boy I can already see the tendency for him to not talk about how he feels, so I have to out right ask him and then listen. Setting an example and giving him options as to how to express himself especially during frustration has been an interesting exploration this month. Thanks, Peace Denise

The Possibilities!

Remember my quote from a couple of inspirations ago? My “nos” and “don’ts” only served to point out the limitations rather than the possibilities. Well, that thought fueled my entire month, especially with my children. I shared it with my husband, too, and we both worked on it. I cannot even express the transformation it has created in our household. My son is even connecting more deeply with his dad, chatting and snuggling more than he has ever done. All we shifted was stopping “nos” to finding a possibility, even if it is fantasy (like the horse story I shared in the module.) Instead of “no, you cannot start that project. It is bed time.” It became “Ooohhh...what a great idea! I bet that will be gorgeous! Let’s leave it here on the table so you remember it for the morning. When you are fresh tomorrow you will be ready to begin!” Instead of “No, you still cannot eat cookies for breakfast.” (A question my son asks about three times a week – really.) It became, “Doesn’t that sound good! Then we can have cake for dessert! Or, better yet, let’s have cake for our meal and eggs for dessert!”

I use the same technique in my new company. Whenever I hear “but no one does that out there”, my response is now, “So, we will be the first!”

Words Month Update

Listen to Marya and Laura as they discuss what has been happening for them this month! Just a 10-minute podcast! Enjoy and let us know how your month is going!

Words vs. no words

(Marya) Like Laura, my focus for words is also with regards to my children. I think I could work on this one every month of every year! Children are always growing and changing in their own understanding and use of words, and in turn challenging me to do the same. I often find I have to think very fast in order to respond in the loving, supportive way I want. The focus on words in general keeps bringing me back to silence. So in my awareness of words I am also going to be aware of no words - being quiet, listening and letting there be silence before I respond or maybe not to respond at all! I am going to focus on talking less, especially with my kids.

Quote for Today

"In studying my words, I began to take note how often 'no' and 'don’t' came up in my life. It was all too often and the result was always to point out the limitations rather than feed the possibilities."

(Laura Erdman-Luntz)

Inspiration: Love is expansive and full of possibilities! Feed the possibilities in yourself and others through your words. What one thing can you do today to feed the possibilities for yourself or others? Let us know.

Words

We are moving into the month on Words. Take a moment to think of one area in your life in which you would like to be more conscious of the words you use. Are there times when you feel unusually negative and slip into language you don’t normally use? Maybe it is gossip, saying “no” too much, or falling into victim language (“I should”, “I have to”, “I need to”). Find an area on place your intention to be more conscious in those areas for the next month. Bring even more joy to your heart! What is it you will be working on? Please share with us.

Inspirational Quote

"If you judge people, you have no time to love them."

Mother Teresa

An Interesting Month

When I was discussing what I wanted to think about this month with Karen and Marya (you can find the podcast here), we talked about how judging others is merely a reflection of what we are judging in ourselves. So, I have spent the last few weeks reevaluating my judgment area for the month (my husband's parenting) and investigating what there is to learn for me. Interestingly, we were right! I do just what he does that I find I want to judge! As I began to become more conscious of my own behavior, my own judgment melted away...

Our Focus On Judgment This Month

Here is a 15-minute podcast with Marya, Karen, and me discussing what we will focus on this month with our judgment focus. Enjoy!

Judgement/control

Hi Everyone: The more I look at judgement and control in my life I find out soemthing new constatnly! I found myself in a situation recently that not only was I judging the other person it immediately turned into me judging myself, and then moving into control. I recently did a internet search on controlling behaviors as a lark and come up with a fantastic article on it that really helped me connect to the fact that my controling behavoirs come from my fears. And although I have heard about this over the last couple of years and knew it applied to me, now I understand the connection. I also found a new understanding when I am presented with someone who is trying to control me. I have tried to exercise caution and step back mentally when I am confronted with someone doing this but now I understand they are moving from their fears just as I was. It brings a whole new level of compassion to the situation, I can now step back with a fuller understanding of what is happening and I can remove my own ego and become more neutral in the situation. Which is definitely more helpful for everyone. I do not have a need for drama, in fact it is the opposite, I really have a need for peaceful interaction with others and this helps me with that! As for judgement it gets propelled from any situation that is creating control issues, so if it is peaceful and neutral then there is no judgement.
Peace, Denise

An Illuminating Month

(Laura) What an incredible month for me! I have so enjoyed taking a deeper look into my self-judgment. What I realized is I have two main areas in which I still have residual judgment, my level of professionalism and my parenting. I have found it extraordinarily helpful to be aware of where I judge myself. It helps me recognize the judgment faster. I had an experience in self-judgment last week when I made a (in the words my spouse and I use) "less than optimal parenting decision." Later that day, after I spent a couple of hours feeling incredibly guilty, I noticed my Wayne Dyer quote of the day was:

"Any energy you place on what transpired in the past
is groundwork for guilt, and ego loves guilt.
Such negative energy fabricates and excuse
for why your present moments are troubled
and gives you a cop-out, a reason to stay out of spirit."
- Wayne Dyer

Hmmm...cop-out, eh? When I think in terms of the ego and being in spirit, I find it much easier to let go of the guilt. And being in-spirit is what my children need most.

So, do you know in what areas you judge yourself? Let us know?

Module Morsel

Hi Laura and Marya: Thank you for such a great module morsel this month. Being able to step back and look at my part in a situation is extremely helpful and takes me out of the "emotion" of the moment. When ever I judge someone else it is just a red flag for me that I am not looking at something!

Thank you for the reminders this month, I will use them!!

Denise

New awareness on judgement

Hi All! (Denise) Each time I have looked at this as a focus something new comes to light. I notice that my husband and I are both very judgemental of ourselves. And hearing him do it to himself makes me wonder what I sound like if I speak my self judgements outloud. I have, ever since I can remember, have had the feeling that whatever I am doing is not quite good enough. And it haunts me at times, the only difference is that now I notice when I fall into that pattern of judgement for myself. To shift I give myself postive self talk, whatever I was feeling negative about I say the exact opposite in a positive statement. That seems to help pull me out, and I know that it is an old pattern, it is not a belief but an attitude. I know I can change my attitudes when I make a concious effort. It also pulls me out of that ego place, being judgemental is ego oriented. All of a sudden it all needs to be about me!! Hahaha...... Anyhow, this is always a good one. Maybe a whole year on self judgement would be cleansing for my spirit. Peace, everyone.

This Week's Module Morsel

As I wrote in my last post, I spent Sunday and Monday in a bit of self-judgment. I can tell you how I felt and what it did to my Focus Area! I felt so negative and I could feel old patterns of negative thinking coming up again to visit me -- all because I was judging myself -- making myself wrong. When I feel that negative, it also brings up my old parenting patterns, the ones I released for a more enlightened approach. I can assure you, my children appreciate it when I am not judging myself!

And Here It Is

I mentioned in an earlier post that I was looking forward to studying this topic this year. I have released much of my self-judgment in my studies through this program and thought maybe I was done with it. Not so, my friends! The specter of self-judgment reared its ugly head in my life today -- more to learn. There was a misunderstanding at the building where I rent space to teach yoga. Something else was scheduled at a time I thought I had reserved. I was angry that I didn't have my space and when I asked about it, they simply said I wasn't on the schedule. I was convinced I had reserved the space and was looking for ways to "prove" I had. Then I began to second-guess myself. What if I hadn't been clear? What if I should have double-checked? Blah, blah, blah. You get the picture, I am sure. Then I began to judge myself around how I was feeling about the mistake. I was surprised something so unimportant could unnerve me.

I then realized, "who cares!" I kept trying to place blame on them or myself (I alternated between the two quite seamlessly!) There is a fabulous quote by Rumi that says: “Out beyond ideas of wrong-doing and right-doing, there is a field. I’ll meet you there.” (Rumi)

What if no one was wrong? What if no one was right? Why do we place blame on ourselves or others?

Inspirational Quote

With each layer of judgment, we put another barrier between ourselves
and being truly present in this moment.”
(Andrew Weiss)

How do you feel when you are judging yourself? You cannot be truly present when you are judging yourself because your thoughts are about something that happened in the past. Judgment keeps us stuck in a negative mental loop that’s foundation is in the past. If you made a mistake, learn from it. Make amends, if necessary, and then allow yourself to move on to live your life with grace. When you are present, you are a gift to yourself and the world.

Failure and Success

Last month in exploring eating, I also learned a lot about self-judgment. I started the month partaking in a cleanse type diet. I made it about a week and then slowly returned to most (not all) of my prior eating habits. In hindsight it may not have been the best time to start. I was feeling fatigued already and hoped the cleanse would help flush out whatever was causing it. Instead I just kept feeling worse. I really wanted to follow through (2 weeks) yet kept having moments where it just didn't seem feasible (energy- or time-wise) to keep going.
What was amazing to me was everything that happened after. I felt guilty for not continuing. I also said I wasn't doing it to lose weight but discovered I was a bit disappointed when I didn't. I even had a few days of feeling like a failure because I didn't finish the 2 weeks! Amazing! No one said I "had to", my health was not dependent on it, there was no prize or punishment at the end. All of these feelings were created by me! Luckily the feelings didn't last long as I talked myself out of it. I felt better as I continued to eat well using many things I did on the cleanse. I also realized I really had done what I originally said I wanted which was to cut back on sugary foods. So in that it actually was a success!
Do you make goals or have ideals (some you may not even be aware of?) and then judge yourself when it doesn't go as planned? What can you do to change the way you judge the situation and yourself? Is it possible to not judge it at all?

Self-Judgment

I have so looked forward to this module this year! As Marya mentioned in today's Module Morsel, I, too, have released much self-judgment in my studies with this program. I know there is more and I am looking forward to feeling even lighter and brighter!

Growing food

I often think back to days gone by (not necessarily my own) when people spent most of their time growing, harvesting and cooking. Not that I would trade most of my leisure time to procure all of my food and yet we've gone so far from it. I do delight in having a garden and being able to grow at least some of my own food.
This past weekend I planted many things I started growing from seed. I have over a dozen heirloom tomato plants, almost 2 dozen broccoli, watermelon, cucumber, peppers and many assorted beans, peas and maybe a pumpkin. Last summer I didn't buy a tomato for almost 6 months! All summer long we ate cucumbers from the garden and we even had a couple of homegrown canteloupe.
I feel a greater connection to and joy in my food when I have some part in it's preparation. Whether it's planting or growing or just in the cutting or cooking. Somehow that also makes me feel better, lighter and more conscious. Processed foods just don't seem to have the same feel.
As my husband says, when I make his sandwiches for lunch, they just have more love in them.

Realizations on food

(Denise) Hi Everyone!!! this topic is excellent, I have seen so many changes in food over the last few years. I would say that I feel the best now that I have ever felt. Never realizing that
much of my moods and sluggishness was due to my diet. I am wheat and soy free at this point, and amazing how light I feel.
One of the biggest realizations I made on food was around abundance in my life. This, of course, (and the of course is for those of you who no me well!) connected itself to money and stability factors. I finally made a connection when everytime I was having to cut back on expenses I was cutting back on food and buying food that was not resonating with the diet my family and I needed. And still I felt a shortage in my pocket book!
So instead, I decided I needed to eat what my body and mind wanted, I did not cut back on shopping or buying what we needed, instead I looked elsewhere in our budget and applied myself to my vocations. I work more hours but with joy in my heart and as I do so, I earn more income, and I feel abundant around food and money. I also have much more joy when I eat and fix meals. My family is happier too since they can also have what they want and need in their diet.
We also have found many new recipes and inspiration from the show "you are what you eat"
it is a bit extreme for us but lots of positive reinforcement around habits and lots of receipes!
If you have satellite and or cable give it a whirl on BBC or go to the website.....
thank you everyone and have a wonderful week! Denise

Inspirational Quote

“Food is a much more powerful tool for transformation than we realize. Imagine where you want to be and eat like that person would eat.
What we need is something we already know somewhere,
we just don’t have the energy or the inclination to put it into practice.”
(Laura Erdman-Luntz)

Share with us one thing you envision changing to reflect who you are becoming. Will you commit to it today?

My Shift

I have been considering this week's quote today:

“What if the Buddha came to dinner at your house? Or Jesus? Or God? Would you serve what you normally eat? If not, why not? And, more importantly, why do you not eat that way every day?” (Laura Erdman-Luntz)

I don't eat dairy due to physical sensitivities but miss cheese desperately and feel deprived. Last night I was at a dinner party and someone brought goat and sheep's cheese. Since those are easier on my system, I indulged. It was delicious! It certainly filled a craving. But then I felt quite, well, icky later. I began to think of myself as a spiritual being and my desire to awaken more deeply. I also knew that the ickiness I felt in my body was preventing me from feeling more deeply spiritual. I made a decision then to not eat any kind of cheese because it kept me from connecting more deeply spiritually. I felt a shift instantly. Now I wasn't coming from a "I can't have it." I was coming from "I want to awaken." It feels softer, more effortless, and it resonates with my compassionate self. I am no longer feeling deprived by my decision and instead feeling quite inspired!

Inspirational Quote

“What if the Buddha came to dinner at your house? Or Jesus? Or God? Would you serve what you normally eat? If not, why not? And, more importantly, why do you not eat that way every day?” (Laura Erdman-Luntz)

Fast(ing) Food

(Marya) This has been an interesting month! After hearing about it from a friend, this month I decided to undertake a detox/cleanse type diet plan call Fat Flush. It is a plan to lose weight but a lot of what is in the plan includes detoxing or cleansing the body (hence the "flush") , pretty intensely for the first 2 weeks. Part of that includes eliminating the most common foods that cause sensitivities (not all out allergies but along that spectrum), such as sugar, dairy, wheat, etc.
Part of the reason I decided to do this is that I tend to eat a lot of carbs. I have a pretty strong sweet tooth for things like cereal, scones, muffins, etc. I know that I gravitate that way especially when I'm tired, not feeling well or just don't have the energy to make something good. Of course, that is exactly when I don't need sweets because they just make me feel worse. I want to stop the cycle.
And so it began May 2. The first 2 weeks was lots of water, lemon and cranberry juice, protein (meats, eggs and powder), numerous veggies and a few fruits. The first day was really tough and by the end of the day I had a headache - I really wanted something sweet! The days after that got easier as I settled into a bit of routine and the cravings for sweets began to go away.
Have you ever given up some type of food you really craved but knew it just wasn't good for you? What did you do for your "fast" and what was the result?

My Carb Addiction

So this month has been interesting for me. Marya has been going through a food detox for herself and talking about her challenges with her clearing her carbohydrate addiction. I have an incredibly clean diet (what comes of being wheat-, dairy-, and corn-free with no white sugar) so I didn’t think I had my carbohydrate addiction anymore. (Years ago I needed two bagels each day to feed my need for gluton! Took a few detoxes to get me off that diet!) Anyway, what was interesting was to notice that not only do I still have a bit of an addiction (I need carbs for breakfast and I like a little something sweet in the afternoon), I was quite irritable to find my husband had eaten the last cookie one day. Some work to do here... But I must say, just knowing about it has helped me change my behavior already.

Eating Questions

Where I want you to begin is more from an energetic standpoint. Pay attention to how you feel as you are eating and for about an hour afterward. Here are some questions for yourself as you are eating:
• Does this smell and look good to me?
• Is it what I want right now?
• As I eat it, does it feed my hunger both physical and mental/emotional?

Still not sure if you are affected by food? Here are some questions to ask yourself after you eat:
• How do I feel now?
• Am I full of energy? Lethargic? Sleepy? Neutral?
• When I look back, did I enjoy my meal?

Inspirational Quote

"I took the time to understand the challenges that I am facing in my life right now and I feed those challenges with proper nourishment." (YLC Participant)

Reflecting Myself

Okay, so after I posted last week's thought, I was bombarded with examples of how I do not reflect myself exactly how I am in the moment. What I mean is, I heard the "voice" in my head saying things like, "Well, this is what always happens." "Well, this is how you always feel." Hmmm...I wasn't allowing myself to grow. I had expectations of the old person. It has been quite insightful for myself. I have been quite enjoying quieting that voice the past few days!

Reflecting Others

I have been reflecting on this week's quote quite a bit this week, thinking about how we have such expectations when it comes to how other people will be. There is a lovely thought in the Yoga Sutras (the precepts of yogic philosophy) that says our goal is to reflect others like a crystal. What it refers to is being able to see people precisely as they are in that moment. We see them clearly without memories of what they they did or said last year, yesterday, or even five minutes ago, and without expectation of what they will do or say. Here is something I would love to give to those in my life...

Inspirational Quote

“I had become a new person; and those who knew the old person laughed at me. The only man who behaved sensibly was my tailor: he took my measure anew every time he saw me, whilst all the rest went in with their old measurements and expected them to fit me.”
-George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950) Man and Superman, 1903

Inspirational Quote

“Be gentle with everyone, for everyone is fighting an inner battle.” (unknown)

You Are a Member of Your Community

(Sorry I haven't posted much for a month. Between a long illness, trip, and, frankly, not inspired, I just didn't have anything to write. I do now, though, and look very forward to blogging on this Module...)

Have you written down a mission statement for your Community? Writing it down is an important step for making it even more real. Once you have your mission statement, ask yourself if you fit in the description. One participant pointed out that she realized she is a member of her own community so she wants to be sure she lives up to her own standards! (Or, rewrite her mission...)

Inspirational Quote

"You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with leave you feeling."
- Jim Rohn

5 people

(Marya) Today's inspirational quote got me thinking about the 5 people I spend the most time with. Who are they? How do I feel being around them? I think what I've discovered is that I really have 2 circles - my immediate family (husband and children) and other family and friends that I spend a lot of time with.
Of course I spend most of my time with my family. I have a husband and 3 kids. Yet when I think about it I notice that so often my mood sets the tone in the house. Yes, we do all interact and feed off of each other, yet as the mom I'm often looked to for answers, advice, direction and mood. It's as they say "If Mom is happy, then everyone's happy" (or vice versa!). Even more important then for me to ensure that the other people I spend time with are positive and uplifting - which they are!
So then who do I spend the most time with? My mom, my best friend and several other wonderful friends/colleagues.
Who are your 5?

Unplanned Fast

(Marya) I started on a media fast earlier this month, without really trying. The effects have been interesting nonetheless. I have not watched the news for some time (since the first time I did this program probably). Then, late last year I switched my Internet home page, which was previously set to MSN (news). I am fairly out of the news loop, however, the one thing I still had was our local weekly newspaper. It only comes on Thursdays and is mainly for our suburban city and surrounding communities. I did get some useful information from it (local events, etc.). About a month ago I received a renewal notice and unintentionally delayed paying the bill. Then several weeks ago I noticed the paper didn't come. My reaction was surprising! At first I was really uncomfortable. Almost a withdrawal type feeling - a little anxious. I came close to buying a copy at a gas station or asking my neighbor for hers. And I thought about sending the check for the subscription but then gave it more thought. Do I really need it? What parts do I need? Can I get that information elsewhere? So I've decided to let it go. If I really need event information, I can get it online or I'm sure one of my neighbors would help. In the meantime, I've got an extra 30 minutes each week to do something else!

Morning Radio Wakeup

When I worked in the 8 to 5 world the "wakeup alarm" was the radio set to a well known national talk radio station. After leaving the 8 to 5 world, the alarm is not always on and was not for the first 16 days of March - for no other reason than it just wasn't :-) My husband wanted to get up early on March 17th and asked me to set it. The next morning I woke up to what I will call "bad news". It was depressing and sad. As I was listening, I felt a heavy feeling in my heart. Later I noticed that I wasn't feeling the joy or connection that I usually feel each day. The experience has stayed with me since that morning as I have thought about it often. I have since changed the "alarm" to a CD that has very up-lifting music. A much better way to start my day.

Noticing the Effects

(Marya) I have lots to share about the media this month! Where to begin? First, my husband has discovered YouTube and has been watching quite a bit lately. Yesterday he shared that he watched several videos from 9/11 the other night. He said he hadn't been searching for that topic, nor did he plan to watch a 71 minute video. What he also discovered was that by the end of the video, he grew so angry that his hands had formed into fists! We had a good discussion about how watching certain things can greatly affect your mood. His response was that he hadn't planned on doing it - he clicked out of curiosity and kept watching like he didn't have a choice. I know it's hard sometimes to turn away or turn it off when something we see or hear is intriguing and especially if it affects our emotions. Yet, it's important to realize that if it impacts us negatively (fists!) that it's even more important to remember that we have the choice and the power to turn it off.

Media Judgments

Okay, I admit it, I was wondering what I could possibly need to do in the media department to increase consciousness more. I already don't watch TV, read magazines, books that have any sort of negativity attached to them. I don't even see msn.com or yahoo.com anymore. (I identified them last year as my big challenge -- even seeing the headlines briefly as I passed by to my mail affected me). Then I got sick, really sick. I have been sick for 8 days now and still not fully recovered. When I was in the thick of it last week, I could hardly crawl to the bathroom. I hurt everywhere. For those of you with small children, you know how difficult this can be. I still needed to get meals together, do baths, and bedtimes. (My husband was doing double duty -- his things and teaching my classes). I turned to the TV for help and here is where my new awareness came up -- I judge watching TV, in general. I know and fully support not using TV to educate or babysit my children. I also appreciate that brain development doesn't occur when they are watching a two dimensional image. I also know I was truly desperate and when I began to judge myself for turning to TV, I felt negativity flare up. It was fascinating! So, here is my work for the month.

Final Thoughts on Fears

Last time we did the program we focused entirely on fear on this teleclass. This time we talked all about unmet needs. So, I want to share a thought that came out of the last program’s call around fear. Here is your question to ponder: Is there such a thing as a “realistic fear”. What does that mean for you? In your fear area in your life, how does the fear help you?

Final Thoughts on Unmet Needs

One great idea that came out of the call this week was letting go of how your needs should be met. One participant mentioned previously feeling very attached to how her needs were met (mostly, who needed to say what). She felt a tangible shift this month and was incredibly surprised to find her need being met in a completely unexpected way. (Interesting to note that the expectation of wanting a need met in a particular way can prevent the unexpected way from flowing into our life.)

admitting a fear

Hi Everyone, This month was especially enlightening. I found that keeping myself in touch with my needs, keeps fears at bay but does not eliminate them. I have discovered a very deep fear for myself, the fear of not being ready to help someone in need. Be it a family member, client or stranger. I do not trust my own abilities, knowledge and intuition fully. My focus area being my family is the toughest, I usually feel I do not know enough and then get frightened that I will not do what I need to do when the moment arises. I have reviewed many times the last month with my father. What I have discovered is admitting the fear is big, now moving forward and trusting myself and furthermore trusting the universe--surrender is my current task. I have been doing more inspirational reading everyday in the morning and before bed to feed this particular need.
I have also found that the more positive energy I create in my life in work and relationships helps me stay present and I have a willingness to look more deeply at myself. Namaste'

Unmet Needs

(by Karen) February has been very interesting for me as I have been sick and recovering every day of it. I went out of town to help my husband with a work project and just when I returned, I became very ill. I have questioned why many times. The more I am able to look back on it, I know I have my answer, it is from unmet needs.

I went to a place I did not want to travel to, to do work that does not inspire or "fill me up". In fact, it wore me down. We worked long hours, ate at different times each day (or sometimes skipped meals all together), stayed in a hotel that was not very comfortable which was right above a bandstand where the band played until 2:00am each morning. The weather was cold and I did not have a proper coat.

For me, taking care of myself (read: meeting my needs) is very important. It is important for me to have enough sleep, to eat healthy and nutritious foods at the same time each day, to spend time doing work and activities that nourish me spiritually and fill me up. While I was away, even though I did do a short yoga practice each day and eat the most healthy and nutritious meals I was able to find (not easy), my needs still were not met.

The sickness has caused me to look a little deeper. Do I have other needs that I am unaware of that were not met before I left? Time will tell :-)

My Lesson for the Month

Oh, my! Where or where do I begin? This month was an incredibly powerful learning experience around fears and unmet needs. My biggest lesson, though, was around receiving. In order to get your needs met, you need to receive what others and the Universe are handing you. Ultimately it comes down to feeling worthy of receiving. Hmmm...I have a hard time admitting to myself that I have felt I am not deserving of receiving gifts, but it is true. The other reason we don't receive is we don't feel we are loved. Neither are true, but are at the base of all of our unhealthy behaviors. I am learning to receive. I even receive hugs from my children in a new way. I feel them and draw in the love they are sending me. It is interesting to notice the change in them. They have smiles of pure contentment on their faces now when they hug me. Then I got it -- it is so much more fun to give to someone who receives. Think about how you feel giving a complement to someone who brushes it off and doesn't accept it versus someone who sincerely looks you in the eye and says, "thank you".

Inspirational Quote

"Love is what we are born with. Fear is what we learn."

(Marianne Williamson)

My One Thing

Okay, it is time to pick on thing to do daily to help get my needs met. I have been doing a breathing and meditation practice every morning lately and it is fabulous! I am going to keep that exercise up and use it to consciously get my needs met. What are you doing?

Hmmmm…The Universe has Other Plans for Me:

So, remember my decision to work with fear this month? Also remember my last post, feeling money issues were in the past and, since money issues have always been the “big fear” for me, I haven’t had much to work with this month. I was with Marya this weekend and she mentioned how she has been finding quotes on the fear piece everywhere. She chuckled, saying it was the message from the Universe. In that moment, I realized I had been receiving quotes on self-care and getting my needs met. I hadn’t yet made the connection that it was my message from the Universe! (Thank you, Marya!)

So, apparently, unmet needs is my focus. I can take a hint! (Even though it may take the proverbial frying pan! ☺) Self-care is a tricky one for me. I am one of those people who does so much people frequently comment “how do you do it all!” Ironically, it is usually with a touch of envy. Trust me when I say, save the envy. I feel a bit like my yoga students who are hyper-flexible. Other students look at them with such envy as they bend their body into every position with such ease. But they have a harder time in yoga. Their body goes too far into poses, putting stress on their joints. They need to learn how to pull out of the poses just enough but not too far to find alignment to receive the lovely benefits of the pose. That’s me. Many look at me with envy, but I go too far. I am putting stress on my joints and I am learning how to pull back just enough but not too far, to receive the benefits of life.

What a fabulous lesson for me!

Inspirational Quote

"Sometimes a situation frustrates me and other times the same situation doesn't bother me at all. Taking care of myself makes all the difference."
-YLC Participant from 2006

Figuring Out My Big Fear

As I mentioned in the Module Morsel this week, money was my “big fear”. (Yes, I am thrilled to announce, I can finally use the past-tense referring to it!) It took me a long time to realize it was my big fear because I didn’t see it as a “fear”. Let me rephrase, I knew I was fearful around money, I just didn’t know I had a choice about how I felt. I saw my anxiety around money as “realistic” and “practical”. I still remember when my life coach broached the idea that maybe I didn’t need to worry about money. I flipped out! (Almost literally – I remember feeling so uncomfortable with the idea, I couldn’t even harbor a thought, however brief, around it.) I remember telling her that would be “irresponsible” because I viewed my thoughts, my worries, as being the responsible and mature way to think about money. I remember thinking that other people who didn’t worry about money were either irresponsible (if they didn’t have a lot of money) or lucky (because they had enough money so they didn’t have to worry).
My turning point came when I noticed how my thoughts about money were affecting my relationship with my children. A thought would come up about money, I could feel the pang in the pit of my stomach, and my interactions with my children would instantly turn negative. I began to see that perhaps, just perhaps, there was a healthier way to interact with money.
It still took me a few years to be able to say money wasn’t fear-based for me. (And, still, when I am tired, not taking care of myself, etc. it comes up. BUT it is no longer my "usual state of being".) My negative attitude with money was so deep in me. What was interesting, though, is I instantly felt better when I realized that I had a choice, that my feelings around money were just my own making and I didn’t have to feel that way. I was then able to begin to separate the fear from my interactions with my children.
I think we all feel our worries, on some level, are responsible. If we didn’t worry it might mean we don’t care. Or, if we aren’t worrying it means we we won’t motivate to change anything. I see it in others with worry around the safety of their children, their health, fears around losing a job or the security of their home. Worry doesn’t help, ever. Think about it. How creative are you in solving problems when you are worried? My husband has told me so often (and I think I am finally listening) to never make a decision from fear. When we make a decision from fear, it is never a good one.

Focus

(Marya) I'm still having a hard time choosing so I'm going to work on both Fear and Unmet Needs. I've let go of a lot of fears already yet I keep finding quotes and articles on the subject recently. I'm open to what may present itself there. I also had a recent realization that often I'm more fearful, or dwell on my perceived fears more, when my basic needs haven't been met. They do go hand in hand (as Denise mentioned in her recent comment).
Today was evidence that I definitely still need to pay attention to my needs. I didn't eat an adequate lunch and was very hungry at dinnertime. As I prepared the meal and served my children I found myself getting extremely agitated and impatient. I was so much better after eating. Note to self (again): must eat good food regularly!

What is Your Focus this Month?

(Laura) In the Module I encourage you to choose either fear or unmet needs to think about this month. What did you choose? If you still aren't sure, choose the one you think affects your Focus Area the most. Let us know!

This Week's Inspirational Quote

“Be patient and loving with every fearful thought.
Practice observing your fears as a witness, and you’ll seem them dissolve.”
(Wayne Dyer)

Fears and Unmet Needs

(Laura) Time to move on to the next month's topic. I think I am going to focus on fears. I have been studying surrender in my life and I would love to release another level of surrender around my fears. Should be an interesting month...

Experiencing Less Anger

(Laura) I can personally attest to this week’s Module Morsel thought (which is why I wrote it!) I experience so much less anger now that I understand what makes me angry. It isn’t even that I need to “control” my anger (control is just an illusion anyway), it is that I have access to a different path. My anger isn’t a necessary path or outlet, I can choose something else.

How things "should" be

My Internet home page is set to Wayne Dyer's Daily Inspiration. This is the inspiration for today:

I release the need to determine how things “should” be.
If you are suffering in your life right now, I can guarantee that this condition is tied up with some kind of attachment to how things should be going.

I think this fits so beautifully with our discussion. For me right now it's not about being right, per se, but about how things should be. (Although, they really are the same when I think about it.) I get frustrated when my kids don't cooperate, don't move fast enough, or change their mind at the last minute. Understandable frustrations, but ultimately about the way I think things should be.
Then there's the dog. We have 2 miniature dachshunds named Walter and Payton. Payton is a girl, black and tan, 11 years old, cute and sweet and my dog. Walter is a boy, brown, 16 years old, mean and my husband's dog. Walter and I have a love/hate relationship. The older he gets, the more I seem to hate him. I feel bad saying it and I've tried to figure out why. Studying this module helped me figure it out - he doesn't act the way I want. Granted, he doesn't act the way most people would want, but I need to find compassion for him. He's 16 (old even for a small dog), fairly blind and deaf and occasionally senile. He doesn't even bother to let us know he has to go out, if we don't do it regularly he'll just go wherever he is - the kitchen rug, the couch, my husband's lap. We also catch him sometimes just standing and staring into a corner. Did I mention he bites? I still have a bruise under my thumbnail from a recent one.
This month's study is dedicated to Walter. May God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change...

Blame and Being Right

I have been thinking about this week’s Module Morsel, specifically Marshall Rosenberg’s idea that anger is from blame. Is there a connection between blame and feeling you are right? (Or am I getting a bit too esoteric! ☺ ) It just feels that blaming and feeling you are right are both ways of making the other person wrong. And, can’t help but see the control in each of those. We have an idea about how something is to go and then blame or feel the other is wrong when it doesn’t flow the way it did in our head. (Of course, the other can be a person or an object or a situation or a dog! ☺) When we draw it into ourselves and fully accept responsibility not for what happened but our reaction to what happened, compassion can ensue.

These thoughts came from my thoughts around does anger only happen when you feel you are right. Marya commented that she wasn’t sure how that fit when she was angry with her dog. I had to admit I didn’t either so I pondered it. Maybe being right is also about feeling you are right about the way something should flow, how a day should go, how your dog and everyone else in your life should act. I know I can get frustrated (read: angry) when my son would has a fit and I have to stop what I am doing to tend to it. This month I have been watching myself and working on being perfectly present with my children. Yesterday I had a lovely day with them. I had a few things I wanted to get done and then went about them with a soft attention. Whenever my children needed me, I stopped immediately what I was doing to turn my full attention to them and be with them completely. The day flowed effortlessly and I seemed to get everything done without even trying. Powerful!

(Sorry for the rambling post. I have a lot on my mind on this topic. Thanks, Marya, for pushing me on this one!)

Compassion and Our Family of Origin...

(Here is something from one of our participants who wanted to remain anonymous. What do you think?)

I had a little dilemma and thought well this was perfect for the compassion club. My focus this year is my family and as of late a little issue with my Mom. She has enormous trouble sleeping, and has ever since I can remember. She does take many medications that are supposed to help but I also think prevent her also from being able to. (So many meds-hard to know what is going on) Anyhow, she complains about it quite a bit. She mentioned to me the fact that she could not turn her thoughts off at night. Which sounds familiar on occassions for me so we got together to discuss breathing and some meditation. I suggested to her to do what I did when I started and then gave her 2 techniques for breathing along with a Andrew Weil tape. What was interesting about it was that she w as par tailly open to the information but kept insisting that she had tried some of it and "how do you let go of thoughts?" Hmmmm,
Well, I tried my best, but one of my family of origin issues is the fact that I am the baby. I tend to be the one that everyone turns to for an empathetic ear but not for action. It very seldom in the past and the very recent past arises that I am knowledgable enough at something to give advice. She tends to dismiss most of what I say, saying that she has tried it all and she just doesn't sleep well (we have had that conversation so many times I cannot count!) Both David and I made the observation that this is a self fullfilling prophecy for her.

So my dilemma is that it is slightly frustrating, I am fine if all that is required of me is to listen but to be drawn in and then dismissed is challenging for me and also how to help if at all?

This Week's Inspirational Quote

“You feel good not because the world is right,
but your world is right because you feel good.”
-Wayne Dyer

What do you think?

Anger and Being Right

“We cannot become angry unless we believe we are right.
Today when you feel irritated about something,
breathe deeply and allow being right to melt into being present.”

Here is a quote from Judith Lasater from her book Living Your Yoga. What do you think? Let us know if you have any experiences around this thought...

What am I angry about?

(Marya) Actually, nothing! Yay! Talk about a transformation! In 2006 I did this program (then called A Year of Living Nonviolently) because I actually felt, well, violent. I could feel anger bubbling all over in me. That year helped me tremendously, most especially to figure out exactly what I was angry about. I've come a long way, baby.
My mission for this year is to be more compassionate and accepting of those in my extended family (beyond my husband and kids). In addition to just outright Anger, I have been experiencing great frustration, irritation, impatience, apathy, annoyance and other derivatives. I've been working through all of these pretty heavily for almost 2 years. I month or so ago I had a huge outburst of anger directed at someone in my family, one like I haven't in a really long time. I felt bad about it and was a little regretful. I realized later that this one big outburst really helped me release a lot and I have felt so incredibly compassionate ever since. Has anyone ever experienced something like that?
Oh, and I did remember something I'm angry at - my dog. But that's another story.

Restorative Yoga = Irritation ???

(by Karen) I am not one for letting go, and I am not one for restorative yoga. I get IMPATIENT and IRRITATED in restorative yoga. Forever, I thought it was because of all the folding of blankets and the organizing and placement of all the props. Wrong! I was feeling the irritation because I knew that after I got everything set up, my work in that pose is to let go, to give up control. Interesting isn't it? Each day this month I have added at least one restorative pose to my yoga practice. I will continue with this for the month of January. It is already making a difference. There is a saying that "there is no place that is not your yoga mat". By working on this on my mat, it will help me to take it off the mat, with the intention of being more aware of where my control issues may lead to impatience, irritation and anger in my life. I'll keep you posted :-)

Quote for Today

Quote:
You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger. The Buddha

Inspiration:
Oh my, do I resonate with today's quote. I feel the punishment most when I become angry with my children. I feel so disconnected with my heart when I am angry and that disconnection hurts me deeply; it causes so much suffering. I also get much more how it isn't my angry words that hurt my children as much as it is the disconnection between us my own disconnection with my heart engenders between us. When hearts disconnect, it is truly painful.

Impatience and Anger and...Control

As I wrote about in the module, my anger still stems from my impatience. What I have since discovered is my impatience stems from more serious control issues. (Anyone else? Am I alone here?) As Marya said in the Module Morsel “accept not expect”. I have many expectations as to how something should go, most specifically, my schedule. I am planned and scheduled to the minute (it feels like sometimes) and children often have different ideas... I am studying surrender for this year to loosen up here. I am ready to feel even more flow in my life.