Inspirational Quote

"If you judge people, you have no time to love them."

Mother Teresa

An Interesting Month

When I was discussing what I wanted to think about this month with Karen and Marya (you can find the podcast here), we talked about how judging others is merely a reflection of what we are judging in ourselves. So, I have spent the last few weeks reevaluating my judgment area for the month (my husband's parenting) and investigating what there is to learn for me. Interestingly, we were right! I do just what he does that I find I want to judge! As I began to become more conscious of my own behavior, my own judgment melted away...

Our Focus On Judgment This Month

Here is a 15-minute podcast with Marya, Karen, and me discussing what we will focus on this month with our judgment focus. Enjoy!

Judgement/control

Hi Everyone: The more I look at judgement and control in my life I find out soemthing new constatnly! I found myself in a situation recently that not only was I judging the other person it immediately turned into me judging myself, and then moving into control. I recently did a internet search on controlling behaviors as a lark and come up with a fantastic article on it that really helped me connect to the fact that my controling behavoirs come from my fears. And although I have heard about this over the last couple of years and knew it applied to me, now I understand the connection. I also found a new understanding when I am presented with someone who is trying to control me. I have tried to exercise caution and step back mentally when I am confronted with someone doing this but now I understand they are moving from their fears just as I was. It brings a whole new level of compassion to the situation, I can now step back with a fuller understanding of what is happening and I can remove my own ego and become more neutral in the situation. Which is definitely more helpful for everyone. I do not have a need for drama, in fact it is the opposite, I really have a need for peaceful interaction with others and this helps me with that! As for judgement it gets propelled from any situation that is creating control issues, so if it is peaceful and neutral then there is no judgement.
Peace, Denise

An Illuminating Month

(Laura) What an incredible month for me! I have so enjoyed taking a deeper look into my self-judgment. What I realized is I have two main areas in which I still have residual judgment, my level of professionalism and my parenting. I have found it extraordinarily helpful to be aware of where I judge myself. It helps me recognize the judgment faster. I had an experience in self-judgment last week when I made a (in the words my spouse and I use) "less than optimal parenting decision." Later that day, after I spent a couple of hours feeling incredibly guilty, I noticed my Wayne Dyer quote of the day was:

"Any energy you place on what transpired in the past
is groundwork for guilt, and ego loves guilt.
Such negative energy fabricates and excuse
for why your present moments are troubled
and gives you a cop-out, a reason to stay out of spirit."
- Wayne Dyer

Hmmm...cop-out, eh? When I think in terms of the ego and being in spirit, I find it much easier to let go of the guilt. And being in-spirit is what my children need most.

So, do you know in what areas you judge yourself? Let us know?

Module Morsel

Hi Laura and Marya: Thank you for such a great module morsel this month. Being able to step back and look at my part in a situation is extremely helpful and takes me out of the "emotion" of the moment. When ever I judge someone else it is just a red flag for me that I am not looking at something!

Thank you for the reminders this month, I will use them!!

Denise

New awareness on judgement

Hi All! (Denise) Each time I have looked at this as a focus something new comes to light. I notice that my husband and I are both very judgemental of ourselves. And hearing him do it to himself makes me wonder what I sound like if I speak my self judgements outloud. I have, ever since I can remember, have had the feeling that whatever I am doing is not quite good enough. And it haunts me at times, the only difference is that now I notice when I fall into that pattern of judgement for myself. To shift I give myself postive self talk, whatever I was feeling negative about I say the exact opposite in a positive statement. That seems to help pull me out, and I know that it is an old pattern, it is not a belief but an attitude. I know I can change my attitudes when I make a concious effort. It also pulls me out of that ego place, being judgemental is ego oriented. All of a sudden it all needs to be about me!! Hahaha...... Anyhow, this is always a good one. Maybe a whole year on self judgement would be cleansing for my spirit. Peace, everyone.