Words: Getting Help

As Marya said in our Personal Comments in this week's Module Morsel, we have been helping each other by noticing when we say something we need to rephrase. My husband and I have been doing it with the way we speak to our children, too. Just remember to only do it with a willing partner! I find not everyone appreciates those corrections...:-)

Inspirational Quote

“You may choose your word like a connoisseur,
And polish it up with art,
But the word that sways, and stirs, and stays,
Is the word that comes from the heart.”

-Ella Wheeler Wilcox, 1906

Lessons Learned Around Words

Okay, so everyone share. What has shifted for you around words either this month or at any other time in your life? What has made the most difference for you? Inspire us!

Expression

Hi Everyone! I missed our call last night but my pondering of words has been a wonderful August focus. It is amazing as we explore these topics how things manage to really fit each month. I have had several family situations where an exploration of words has been useful. Being able to express feelings in away that is communicating well and not venting. I can spot two frustrating situations that although I will not go into details, it was important to pick the best words to own my feelings and express myself without attachment. The first situation was the learning curve and the second went well. Using "I" statements and not the famous "s" word, "should" or pointing fingers at others when really what I need to do is express my own feelings in a healthy way. This has been necessary in raising my 15 year old. Being a boy I can already see the tendency for him to not talk about how he feels, so I have to out right ask him and then listen. Setting an example and giving him options as to how to express himself especially during frustration has been an interesting exploration this month. Thanks, Peace Denise

The Possibilities!

Remember my quote from a couple of inspirations ago? My “nos” and “don’ts” only served to point out the limitations rather than the possibilities. Well, that thought fueled my entire month, especially with my children. I shared it with my husband, too, and we both worked on it. I cannot even express the transformation it has created in our household. My son is even connecting more deeply with his dad, chatting and snuggling more than he has ever done. All we shifted was stopping “nos” to finding a possibility, even if it is fantasy (like the horse story I shared in the module.) Instead of “no, you cannot start that project. It is bed time.” It became “Ooohhh...what a great idea! I bet that will be gorgeous! Let’s leave it here on the table so you remember it for the morning. When you are fresh tomorrow you will be ready to begin!” Instead of “No, you still cannot eat cookies for breakfast.” (A question my son asks about three times a week – really.) It became, “Doesn’t that sound good! Then we can have cake for dessert! Or, better yet, let’s have cake for our meal and eggs for dessert!”

I use the same technique in my new company. Whenever I hear “but no one does that out there”, my response is now, “So, we will be the first!”

Words Month Update

Listen to Marya and Laura as they discuss what has been happening for them this month! Just a 10-minute podcast! Enjoy and let us know how your month is going!

Words vs. no words

(Marya) Like Laura, my focus for words is also with regards to my children. I think I could work on this one every month of every year! Children are always growing and changing in their own understanding and use of words, and in turn challenging me to do the same. I often find I have to think very fast in order to respond in the loving, supportive way I want. The focus on words in general keeps bringing me back to silence. So in my awareness of words I am also going to be aware of no words - being quiet, listening and letting there be silence before I respond or maybe not to respond at all! I am going to focus on talking less, especially with my kids.

Quote for Today

"In studying my words, I began to take note how often 'no' and 'don’t' came up in my life. It was all too often and the result was always to point out the limitations rather than feed the possibilities."

(Laura Erdman-Luntz)

Inspiration: Love is expansive and full of possibilities! Feed the possibilities in yourself and others through your words. What one thing can you do today to feed the possibilities for yourself or others? Let us know.

Words

We are moving into the month on Words. Take a moment to think of one area in your life in which you would like to be more conscious of the words you use. Are there times when you feel unusually negative and slip into language you don’t normally use? Maybe it is gossip, saying “no” too much, or falling into victim language (“I should”, “I have to”, “I need to”). Find an area on place your intention to be more conscious in those areas for the next month. Bring even more joy to your heart! What is it you will be working on? Please share with us.